Cyberpunk Review » MPAA wants Obama to hand the Internet to them

Source: Electronic Frontier Foundation, Change.gov

The quest for Internet domination continues. With king W on his way out next month (hopefully sooner), the media fascists are now looking to kiss Barack Obama’s ass in an obvious attempt to seize control of the Internet. Fortunately, Obama’s Change.gov site put the gestapo’s agenda (the “MPAA’s Key International Trade Issues”) online for all to see, and the EFF translated the political-lobbyist-speak into plain English.

The MPAA has “issues.” To solve these “issues,” the MPAA wants to be able to do packet sniffing and filtering for censorship operations, implement a “three strikes” punishment system for file sharers, and force foreign governments to do similar stuff.

Blah blah blah blah blah piracy blah blah blah blah blah blah lost revenues blah blah blah blah blah blah CEO’s need ivory ass-scratchers blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah control Internet blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah free speech is anti-American blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah censorship good blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah profit margins blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah proactively leverage synergies blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blllllllllllllllllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………………….

Seriously, does anyone give a fuck about the media gestapo anymore? They’ve been spewing the same shit about “piracy” and “lost revenues” out of their mouths for the past couple of years now. Their solution? Persecute people without the means to defend themselves in court. God forbid the MPAA goes after some high-ranking congressperson’s kid who’s been openly sharing the latest Jonas Brothers CD on Bittorrent. If they want to show how serious they are about stopping piracy, they need to grow testicles and start with the Somali pirates.

Normally, I wouldn’t consider doing this, but here’s a little ditty that best expresses what I’m feeling about the media gestapo. Soon to be reviewed for CPR, this is the Futuristic Sex Robotz with Fuck The MPAA. Feel free to sing along:

Spread the word

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Comments

The problem with the assholes at MPAA and RIAA is that if they get it completely their way, they are gonna control the flow of information on the whole planet.

Their claims are too high and far-reaching. They need to step back a notch if they want to get taken seriously. If the government accepted everything they asked, our taxes would be wasted on going after every single internet user.

As long as most of the population is gonna be pirating stuff, this will be a wild goose chase. All we have to do is not let them scare us. By this definition, it may be argued they are behaving like terrorists, but I won’t go into that.

I’m tired of this. The media industry actually grows. It may be “losing revenues”, but it’s still making too much money for the shit they pump out all the time. Plus, there is absolutely no way to figure out how many sales they would have done by looking at the download stats. I don’t have the cash to buy all the games I play. I buy a few, the ones I prefer, mostly when I want the content that requires a valid CD key or something. Most people would watch a lot less movies and play a lot less games if they had to buy every single one. The offers are growing, but our wallet is shrinking. We have to make choices.

A few game developpers got this already, and are trying to find a way around piracy instead of trying to make it disappear. Kudos to them.

two words, chemical reactions. Fixes everything

Exactly at what point did these people start thinking that they could control the actions of everyone with a computer? They have no more business snooping into our business than the government does. Yeah guys, good luck fining and throwing the entire world in jail, because according to your own guidelines, I would have to say that everyone has downloaded a song or watched a pirated movie at least once since the Internet’s inception.

Quit whining and deal with it. If the government couldn’t win the war on drugs, you’ve certainly got no chance of winning this. Hey, you could always do what the government did - partner up with the people you’re fighting against! Yeah! Or you could maybe admit that paying $29.99 for a disc that cost you $.29 to produce is pushing it a bit too far (and don’t whine to me about production costs, either - maybe you shouldn’t be paying these actors millions of dollars).

I just wanted to say thank you for this great site. We need more cyberpunk!