If you pick up any medical journal today you will find yourself bombarded by an onslaught of new wave mental disorders ranging from Bi-polar, to schizophrenic, to depressive, to even lethargy and fatigue. All of which of course have been chopped up, renamed, sub categorized, classified, and made politically correct. Possibly the newest wave entry one could feasibly concoct, and stands as a marvel of modern advancement: Internet Addiction.

You can find it listed under a multitude of acronyms such as: IAD (internet addiction disorder), PIU (problematic internet use),  CIU (compulsive internet use). It is even sometimes comically referred to as iDisorder. Different names all meaning the same thing – people are stuck to the computer and just can’t stop.

Before you you hypochondriacs out there start shitting yourselves keep in mind hardcore internet addicts aren’t your casual every day facebook surfer or Reddit user. These are people who live at their computer compulsively. Even if you’ve read every article there is to read and watched every video there is to watch, even if you haven’t showered in weeks, even if you can literally smell your refuse around you- or maybe have stopped eating altogether- you will not leave your computer screen. They let their lives lead to ruin and will often choose losing all comforts and security than their computers. These are people who will literally fucking shank you for your wifi password.

This begs the question of “why?”. Can the virtual allure of faceless interactions both pure and sorrid, videos of cats, Google, music, videos, and shopping be really so engrossing that people are stuck enough on it that they let their whole lives turn to shit?

Modern society says: YES!

For centuries man kind has sought escape from the limitations of reality. We have treated the harsh fact of our existence like an ailment which our common, every day garden variety day dream can’t treat. This comes as little surprise since when we look at our lives from an objective stand point, it really isn’t that great. We’re stuck in bodies that we most of the time hate (even if we like them they will one day age and sag like a bulldogs jowls) we have to deal with mortality, disease, discomfort, and the inconvenience of human limitations. Your average person deals with children, bills, and just the dreck of existing which has become a chore in and of itself. Life had become not a gift, but a job. Since mankind realized this they have chased after coveted and precious substances for altering the mind and body which can at times be priced higher than gold.

These things have always gone in a cycle. They are presented as medicine, a miracle cure all! Cocaine was given to children for toothaches and women in labor were shot up with Heroin. A glorious age of dependence rose from that and soon after mankind just got cocky. We started pumping out handfuls of uppers, downers, magic pills, and elixirs- only to soon after outlaw, ban, and restrict all of them. One thing hasn’t changed; humanity still seeks escape.

Afraid of death? No problem, just respawn! Don’t like how you look? Use photoshop, results guaranteed! Are you bored? We have millions of things to read and watch! Hungry? You can order online. Horny? Here’s pornhub! Don’t feel listened to? Try twitter! Tell everyone how good that sandwich is!

It comes at you like a list of advertisements for prescription medications. The human mental state is a fucking disease. All drugs start as medications, after all.

In 1995 Internet Addiction was a joke made by a cheeky M.D. Ivan Goldberg. his essay highlighted the criteria for the proposed disorder (which can be found here: http://www.netaddiction.com/articles/symptoms.pdf). He was unknowingly ahead of his time.

How does this all tie into the grand cycle of creation and damnation, you ask? Because Internet Addiction is the end-all addiction. It is around you every day, everywhere you go. You certainly can’t stop others from using it lest we be thrust back into our knuckle dragging hominid ways of face to face interaction. No, the internet addict is superior! They have circumvented the system of punishment and reward to filter out all the punishment and be left with nothing but instant gratification. Internet addiction seemed far more daunting a threat when the only computer options were stationary and disallowed the addict from movement. Now you have a million options to get your fix. After the invention of the laptop and wifi, everything went to hell for the troglodytes. Soon after followed, tablets, touch phones, and the ever popular iPhone. Devices like these allow us to remain plugged in while we get our precious vitamin D in the outside air. Even work places have allowed casual browsing in between smidgens of menial soul crushing labor. With all these accommodations being made by the industry for addicts we aren’t only feeding the addiction- we’re coddling it, dressing it in terrycloth jumpers, and inviting it to tea.

To put it short: they have us by the balls.

Despite the overwhelming push of the tech boom there are still factions that are committed solely to ending internet addiction. If you plug the words internet addiction into Google you’re going to find pages of self help sites (which seem rather contradictory), foundations, even boot camp style treatment centers where they have you sweat out the poison so to speak. The leading nation in treating internet addiction is- unsurprisingly- China. It isn’t hard to imagine a country as technologically advanced, crowded, and substandard in quality of life as China, might have an internet addiction problem. What they lack in real space they make up for with fake space- cyber space! Who needs clean air outside, when you can sit in air filtered cubes and plug into the latest prototype tech- which is going as far to simulate realistic sex:

http://gfycat.com/BleakFewInchworm (Slighty NSFW)

This has been described as a national crisis in China where they value productivity above all else. It’s considered almost disgraceful. Similar attitudes are held in Japan where introverts who are glued to their computers can be referred to by the broad term Hikikomori. State funded centers for treatment can be found among private ones to try and stem the flood of growing addicts. They have also been quick to associate internet addiction to a  string of vehicle related deaths involving people so glued to their smart phones they have been harmed or run over.

separate walk lanes for people on cellphones and off to alleviate walkway congestion and keep them from wandering into the street.

separate walk lanes for people on cellphones and off to alleviate walkway congestion and keep them from wandering into the street.

Now while this all can sound hazardous, and it probably is, the industry recognizes it cannot fix what it has created so it just has to be a little more creative and make a buck while doing it. Google glass is the next step of turning the internet addict of today into the common man of tomorrow. With special ultra light displays and instant streaming nearly everywhere you go, its no longer an addiction but a way of life. It goes from being detrimental to being a near necessity as jobs demand higher productivity in the tech space and multi-communication fields as well as PR and social networking.

We are coming to embrace the notion that what separates an addiction from a lifestyle is how easily you can carry it around with you. Whether this attempt at mainstreaming humanity into constant cyber stimulation will prove detrimental or benign has yet to be seen but one thing is for fucking certain:

The future is here, and we just can’t get enough of it.

 

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3 Responses

  1. Adam

    Great article! Pay no mind to the haters. Wouldn’t be the internet without them.

    I’m pretty sure I could be an internet addict, if I didn’t have to work to keep my internet going. 😛

     
  2. Kelly

    Amazing to see such an atrocious article from this site. An overdone topic as of late and you’ve brought nothing new or interesting to the table while hashing it out.
    This seems like an assignment done 30 minutes before it was due, really.

     
  3. Jason

    This writing was terrible. I’m astounded it got published. It reads like a teenager wrote it.